Monday, July 28, 2008

Bad Mail Karma

I come from a family encumbered with the pain and suffering of Bad Mail Karma although fortunately, for the most part, I have been spared many of the horrors which have been visited upon my mother and her sisters. In Spain - contrary to the experiences of my fellow-bloggers - I have experienced nothing less than stellar service from the Post Office. In fact, the only pieces of mail I have failed to receive have been letters sent by my mother and her sisters. But that's their Bad Mail Karma, not mine.

Last week a notice was crammed into our mailbox indicating that either a registered letter or a package - for the little descriptive box remained unticked - was awaiting me or Señor Gato Gringo- for the name in the little address box was illegible - at La Línea's Correos. Huzzah! - a parcel! Or a letter! Is it even for us? asked Señor G.G. who had clearly and rather maliciously just donned his buzzkill hat. You can't read the name on the pick-up notice. It behooved me to remind him that, unlike my family, I don't suffer from Bad Mail Karma.

Now because this is the summer and because this is Spain, many of the country's services have pared back their hours of operation. The post office in La Línea is no exception. In the realm of I-want-to-work-for-the-Spanish-post-office-when-I-grow-up, the Correos here is open from 8:30 a.m. to 1:00 p.m. for the duration of the summer. Which makes for very long line-ups from 8:00 a.m. to 12:59 p.m. After several abortive and admittedly half-hearted attempts to wait patiently in line, I finally capitulated last Thursday, and not only joined the line but stood in it not very patiently while those in front of me remortgaged their homes and set up trust funds for their grandchildren and mailed boxes of sherry to Uruguay. All requiring vast numbers of forms and a multitude of stamps.

Thirty-ish minutes later, I eagerly thrust my notice and my passport under the glass partition which separated me and a Frazzled Postal Worker, sending him off to the parcel shelf on what I hoped would not be a wild goose chase. Would it be a package? A prezzie?!! I asked Señor G.G. who, upon close inspection, was not only still wearing his buzzkill hat but had also adopted a don't-get-your-hopes-up expression. Husbands can be so tiresome.

Much to my disappointment - although I think I detected an I-told-you-so humpfff from Señor G.G. - the Frazzled Postal Worker quickly abandoned the parcel shelf and began rooting through the registered mail file, from which he pulled out a rather dull but official-looking letter. I offered Señor G.G a you-can-take-your-I-told-you-so humpfff and ram-it-up-your-ass-humpfff of my own. Amidst the humpfffing the Frazzled Postal Worker shoved my pick-up notice and a pen under the glass partition and asked me (I think) to sign for it. I duly signed the notice and shoved it and the pen back under the glass partition. He then shoved the letter and my original pick-up notice back under under the glass partition.

It wasn't for me.

Not only was it not for me but the recipient's name clearly indicated that he was of the y-chromosome persuasion. Perhaps a quick shufti at my passport - or my double-D secondary sexual characteristics - would have satisfied the Frazzled Postal Worker that I could not be anyone by the name of Francisco or Javier.

I confess that I left the Correos a little disappointed and a whole lot perplexed; after all, I had just
been handed a registered letter which clearly belonged to an individual of the opposite sex as well as the original pick-up notice which bore his name and my signature. Indeed, there would be no record that Francisco Javier had picked the letter up. I could rip it up unto a thousand little pieces and cackle in malevolent delight as his electricity is turned off. Hope he's not showering at the time. So it would seem that, like my mother and aunts, Francisco Javier too suffers from Bad Mail Karma.


Bluestreak said...

very funny post. post offices here are so weird. There´s always a bunch of non-postal related stuff going on. At least they don´t smoke in the post offices anymore. Then you had to deal with them taking three puffs of a smoke before licking each stamp.

Di Mackey said...

Laughing quietly on the inside all the way through this one ... which is a miracle, due to have a summer case of grouchiness on a grand scale.

Sorry there was no package ... or letter ...

ninest123 said...

ninest123 16.03
ray ban sunglasses, michael kors outlet, ray ban sunglasses, gucci outlet, nike free, longchamp, cheap oakley sunglasses, uggs on sale, tiffany and co, prada outlet, jordan shoes, michael kors outlet, michael kors outlet, ray ban sunglasses, oakley sunglasses, ugg boots, prada handbags, oakley sunglasses, chanel handbags, burberry outlet online, tory burch outlet, tiffany jewelry, louis vuitton outlet, christian louboutin outlet, nike outlet, louis vuitton, polo ralph lauren outlet, michael kors, louboutin, oakley sunglasses, longchamp outlet, polo ralph lauren outlet, burberry, louboutin shoes, replica watches, louis vuitton, ugg boots, michael kors outlet, oakley sunglasses, louis vuitton, louis vuitton outlet, replica watches, nike air max, nike air max, longchamp outlet, louboutin outlet, michael kors outlet, ugg boots, ugg boots

ninest123 said...

ray ban uk, hogan, air force, nike roshe run, kate spade handbags, hermes, michael kors, mulberry, true religion jeans, lululemon, sac guess, abercrombie and fitch, air jordan pas cher, longchamp pas cher, burberry, coach purses, michael kors, nike air max, true religion outlet, michael kors, sac longchamp, nike free, oakley pas cher, nike blazer, hollister, new balance pas cher, ralph lauren uk, true religion jeans, nike air max, north face, vanessa bruno, converse pas cher, air max, coach outlet, louboutin pas cher, tn pas cher, kate spade outlet, north face, nike free run uk, coach outlet, true religion jeans, lacoste pas cher, nike air max, ralph lauren pas cher, michael kors, hollister pas cher, vans pas cher, replica handbags, ray ban pas cher, timberland

ninest123 said...

nike air max, wedding dresses, babyliss, ipad cases, new balance, p90x workout, valentino shoes, vans shoes, iphone cases, iphone 6 cases, ferragamo shoes, north face outlet, iphone 6s plus cases, mcm handbags, nike trainers, hollister, instyler, longchamp, iphone 5s cases, nfl jerseys, oakley, louboutin, birkin bag, iphone 6 plus cases, nike roshe, abercrombie and fitch, nike roshe, soccer shoes, mont blanc, beats by dre, chi flat iron, celine handbags, ghd, mac cosmetics, soccer jerseys, herve leger, asics running shoes, iphone 6s cases, bottega veneta, nike huarache, s5 cases, baseball bats, hollister, hollister, giuseppe zanotti, reebok shoes, ralph lauren, jimmy choo shoes, timberland boots, insanity workout, north face outlet, lululemon

ninest123 said...

ugg,ugg australia,ugg italia, moncler, moncler, converse, swarovski, marc jacobs, louis vuitton, juicy couture outlet, sac louis vuitton pas cher, hollister, canada goose, wedding dresses, coach outlet, canada goose outlet, pandora jewelry, canada goose, toms shoes, moncler, canada goose outlet, juicy couture outlet, links of london, pandora charms, pandora jewelry, moncler, barbour jackets, moncler, ugg,uggs,uggs canada, ray ban, canada goose, lancel, gucci, replica watches, doudoune canada goose, bottes ugg, converse outlet, swarovski crystal, thomas sabo, louis vuitton, moncler, ugg boots uk, canada goose uk, supra shoes, moncler outlet, louis vuitton, pandora charms, karen millen, montre pas cher, ugg pas cher, canada goose, moncler, barbour, louis vuitton
ninest123 16.03